I got this book for Christmas from a family member who knows I'm into sport, but not really much else. The intention was there, so that's what matters.

Once the morning activities were done, I sat down to read this before lunch. And finished it before lunch. I'm a quick reader at the best of times, but I got through this in about an hour and a half.

Why? Because it's written like someone without a single inkling of literary style. I've not read one of James Griffins books before - nor do I know if he has any - but holy crap this was terrible to read. Everything was written really large like, with lots of pictures, because clearly everyone who reads this is a rugby 'boofhead' [as Ali refers to everyone not on his agenda] and can't read little words. On top of this, there's this annoying thing where every page or two the writing will split and there'll be one of those enlarged quotes like you see in the newspaper... Except in this book, that's part of the writing. It's fucked. It's annoying. It's horrid.

It was almost enough, at one point, to make me give up. But I didn't, because I was spurred on by the promise of something good. And there are gems in here - like the story about getting injured playing touch on Eden Park in the nude, the day before the All Blacks were selected and Steve Hansen refusing to take him unless he fessed up. Or when 'ABC and ABD' came to visit him in hospital. Or flying RC planes and helicopters with noted aviator Richie McCaw. At one stage, Dan Carter is described in a way which now has me thinking of him as a modern-day Dennis the Menace [which he totally would be]. The best highlight for me was the revisiting of that try Doug Howlett scored against the Wallabies. You know, the one where Ali put up that gracious, precise floater and Howlett literally just caught it and fell over to score the try. God that was a beauty.

But there wasn't enough. Repeating a story about Keith Robinson meeting the Queen that was published in the media at the time wasn't enough. Not naming players in stories wasn't enough.

And as well as the quote style, I got more and more fucked off with the practice of starting a story and ending it with 'but that's a story for another time'. No it's fucking not. I got this book for free, but other people have paid for it. They haven't paid for you to not tell stories.

I liked Ali before this, as a player and a personality. I still like him as a player, no matter what Hadyn's stats suggest about his fluctuating workrate, and I think he's been remarkably unlucky with his injuries. But next time you release a book, please either keep the style informal, like it is here, and only have 'funny' anecdotes [spoiler alert: 90% of the time in this book, the 'funny' stories relate to him being pissed] or the more insular, personal style like in the bits talking about the 2007 RWC loss or the feud with David Nucifora. Not both. Because as it stands now, this book is annoying in three different ways and I sure as hell won't recommend anyone buy it. I'd loan it to friends who are interested, but I'd warn people against buying it.

I can't count the number of times I've engaged in a rigorous debate with a rugby fan about our respective national teams, only to be rebutted [usually by English fans it seems] with the outrageous claim that the All Blacks are only as strong as they are because they 'steal' players from the Pacific Islands and if we only used players from our own country, we'd be, well, fucked.

Take a guess how many players in the All Blacks end-of-year tour squad were not born in New Zealand. If your guess was not four, you're wrong. Jerome Kaino was born in American Samoa, Junior Malili Muliaina is from Western Samoa, Rodney So'oialo is from Samoa and Sitiveni Sivivatu is, of course, a Fijian.

Of the four, Mils moved here when he was two years old, Sivi when he was 17 and it is unclear about Kaino or So'oialo, but all four attended a New Zealand high school. Yes, there is the whole 'scholarship' facade in schools, but that same process is used around the world in all sports. Most of the 'island' players in the All Blacks were born here and raised here. They're ours.

To say that NZ has some form of insidious scheme in place to identify talent and kidnap shows that there is a real lack of understanding about the way our country's citizenship laws have been set in the past, and political problems which have faced it. It also suggests that the NZRU have some form of Delorean time-machine which they use to travel back 20 years and convince people to move to NZ before they have a child, because they know that that kid will be good.

Lets take Neemia Tialata for an example. Tialata was born in Upper Hutt, before his parents returned to Samoa. They came back to New Zealand when he was five. Being born here, he was an NZ citizen. But wait. Neemia was born in 1982. If his parents were born residing in NZ before 1 January 1949, they would be NZ citizens, and he would receive this title by the rule of descent. There's about four different ways he would be an NZ citizen [and so would the other 'islanders']. Read them here.

These people, when told this, will try and switch it back on you. 'The All Blacks aren't the only team doing it' or 'what about in the Super 14 then?' they'll say.

So let's look at that. In the Super 14 there are only 14 players from another country playing for a franchise, whose birthplaces I can solidly identify. That's not even enough to make a team! These are:

Blues: Jerome Kaino [American Samoa], Benson Stanley [Australia], Josevata Rokocoko [Fiji], Isaia Toeava and George Pisi [Samoa]
Chiefs: Sione Lauaki [Tonga], Sitiveni Sivivatu [Fiji] Mils Muliaina [Samoa]
Hurricanes: John Schwalger [Western Samoa], Rodney So'oialo and David Smith [Samoa]
Crusaders: Ben Franks [Australia]
Highlanders: Joe Tuineau [Fiji] and Fetu'u Vainikolo [Tonga]

So what's going on then? David Campese seems adamant in this article that the big nations are plundering the stocks of Pacific Island countries [please, suppress your laughter at the irony of him using a picture of Nicky Little, who was born in Tokoroa, in that article].

In fact, because fair's fair, I took a look at all the tier-one teams and the Pacific tier-two sides. Of the Pacific teams Samoa has the highest number of foreign-born players. 10 of their squad were born overseas - all of them in New Zealand (Junior Polu, Fa'atonu Fili, Seilala Mapusua, Gavin Williams, Cencus Johnston, Justin Va'a, Filipo Levi, Joe Tekori, Kane Thompson and Jonny Faamatuainu). I couldn't confirm the numbers for Tonga because a. the Tonga RFU site is still down [has been for at least a year now] and there was too little information on most of them - but it looked like the majority were from Tonga, and Fiji has two Kiwis; the aforementioned Nicky Little, and Deacon Manu.

When I turned my eyes to the tier-one teams, there were a few surprises waiting for me. I knew Dumpling was from Canada, but didn't know about O'Gara's heritage. I think it's cool that Argentina's only 'import' hails from Belgium. The list of all the nations I haven't discussed in here is at the bottom of this article.

As I've written this piece though, I've started to wonder something. It's really easy to look at a country and say 'you've got a lot of island boys in your side, you steal them'. But even in the case of Sivivatu, who came here when he was 17, I think it's more a case of a player taking advantage of a side than the side taking advantage of them. Think about it. The training staff and programmes available within NZ are of a higher quality than those in the Pacific Islands. The fact we have rugby in two windows which can allow those players to compete in their own club/domestic competition if they so choose is another. Would Ma'a Nonu be as good as he is now if he had lived, played and trained in Samoa all his life? Would Josevata Rokocoko? And by the same token, would Pierre Hola be a great All Black if he'd moved to New Zealand if he was a kid?

PS: When you read Campese's piece, please let me know what you think. I've written this all about union, because I can't find full stats for Sevens. It's hard to find the significant main point in his piece. He begins speaking about Sevens, then switches to discussing Union with the RWC, then blabs on about 'clubs' not releasing players without saying which, moves on to complaining about the rules in Sevens, then he's going on about rucking... What? It's all over the fucking place.

PPS: I loved this pearler of a quote:

Sevens used to be full of guile and skill but now it’s played according to XVs rules with teams kicking for touch and taking the ball into contact.

Campo, I've watched both the Dubai and George Sevens over the past fortnight and the kicking I've seen has either been an attacking effort, or an attempt to waste time when the team kicking is ahead with not much time to go.

England: Matt Banahan [Jersey], Ayoola Erinle [Nigeria], Simon Shaw [Kenya], Steffon Armitage [Trinidad], Paul Doran-Jones [Ireland], Dylan Hartley [New Zealand]

Australia: David Pocock [Zimbabwe], Stephen Moore [Saudi Arabia], Matt Dunning [Canada], Dean Mumm, Digby Ioane and Quade Cooper [New Zealand], Will Genia [Papua New Guinea]

France: Thierry Dusautoir [Côte d'Ivoire], Fulgence Ouedraogo [Burkina Faso]

South Africa: Tendai Mtawarira [Zimbabwe]

Wales: Luke Charteris and Tom Shanklin [England]

Scotland: Ben Cairns, Jim Thompson, Hugo Southwell [England], Thom Evans [Zimbabwe], John Barclay and Graeme Morrison [Hong Kong], Nathan Hines [Australia]

Italy: Luke McLean and Craig Gower [Australia], Carlo Del Fava [South Africa] Josh Sole and Kaine Robertson [New Zealand], Sergio Parisse, Matías Agüero and Gonzalo Canale [Argentina], Manoa Vosawai [Fiji]

Ireland: Ronan O'Gara [USA], Jamie Heaslip [Israel], Tom Court [Australia]

Argentina: Esteban Lozada [Belgium]

After the weekend's loss to the Barbarians all the talk about the All Blacks has turned to 'depth' and whether they have any. Coach Graham Henry has said that rotation is necessary, like it or not - I actually think people have a problem with the 6 month rest side of the rest and rotation policy, not rotation itself, but I could be wrong.

I don't think there's much to say about the loss because it was not a team we've seen play before, barring the stop-start affair against the Italians and even then the changing of the halfback and first-five is significant enough to alter the backline to the point where moves ebb and flow. I would like to know what happened to Stephen Donald to have people put his intercepted pass down to wooziness, because I've seen that move twice before this season - once against Wales, where Jimmy Cowan was the culprit and once against France where Luke McAlister threw it - and it's not come off. It's a simple M2, where the passer will follow up and offer a wrap option, but it doesn't often work across vast distances. When it does it's fantastic because the defence have to cover another attacker with one fewer player, but is risk > reward?

NZDK - Following Ireland's calls to be admitted to the 2010 Fifa World Cup yesterday, the All Black coaching panel of Graham Henry, Steve Hansen and Wayne Smith have requested that the IRB allow their side to automatically play in the final of the 2011 Rugby World Cup as a third team.

Look I think it's fairly obvious, we lost that World Cup due to a forward pass, which is the rugby equivalent of a hand ball essentially. If Ireland can ask to be an extra team at their World Cup, we should be allowed to do the same.

Referee Wayne Barnes was criticised, mainly in New Zealand, for his performance in the 2007 Rugby World Cup quarter-final match between the All Blacks and France where he did not award a single penalty toward the All Blacks in the second half, and allegedly missed a forward pass which led to the game-winning try for the French. Responding to claims the public should just move on, Steve Hansen had this to say:

mmmmumble mmmumble murmurmurmurgoing forward. Rhubarbrhubardmurmur step up. Whisperwhispermumble. Who wants a Milo?

The calls may come as a shock for some people who felt the All Blacks should be focusing on this week's match against the Barbarians XV in London, and after the team appeared to be in a buoyant mood after their emphatic win over France on the weekend, but Henry had the last word for the watching media.

Look, you can say we're harping on, you can say that we're whingers, but if you're going to contemplate giving the fucking Irish a free pass, why not us?

We haven't given away anything for a while, so it's probably about time we did.

The person who can come up with the best caption for this picture of Adam Thomson jumping on Mike Delany in London by next Wednesday will get my copy of this book and some coffee to go with it, so you can tell the stories to guests while you drink coffee after dinner, as the stories were intended to be told. Or just drink the coffee yourself while you read it. Off you go now!

By now you've seen the All Blacks' win over France, or at least heard about it from someone who saw it. You know the scoreline, 39-12. You've watched the All Blacks' attack absolutely dismantle the French defense. You've had described to you the scrums, which started off horribly and turned into an even contest. You heard about the rucks and the brilliance of Richie McCaw and Kieran Read in that area. But you've paid most attention to Sivivatu, Mils and Jane, who were in blazing form.

That was the difference between this test and all the others I think. The forwards were not as dominant as they have been in past tests, particularly against Australia, Cowan was his usual exceptional self, Carter ran as well as always [when he did], Nonu was his normal rhinoceros persona charging at the line.

But when a deep kick was fielded, it was returned by that player. It wasn't kicked back with a midfield bomb, nor was it spread across the field [a tactic which doesn't work anymore].

Sivi, Mils and Jane backed themselves. And it paid off. You could see their confidence lift [not that it was lacking] as each return reaped more and more reward. Look at Mils try where Sivi faked a kick to draw the defender! The three of them all scored tries in the game, the first time this has happened against a tier-one side since 2003's Rugby World Cup match against France [Mils, Rokocoko and Howlett got a try apiece. For the historians among us, the back three have scored against tier-two nations twice between now and then - Rokocoko, Evans and Sivi against Romania at the 2007 RWC and in 2005, Sivi, Mils and Howlett each grabbed a 5-pointer against Fiji.]

The thing which got to me though was in the final 10 minutes. France would receive a full-arm penalty within our half and take the kick at goal. Why? You'd broken our line throughout the game, only to have stoic defense hold you out from. You'd kept the ball in hand and barely played the territory game.

The answer is obvious, of course. They gave up. Conrad Smith put the final nail in the coffin and the French knew they didn't have a chance. But still - would it not have been good to be the team that does what no team has done for two years [not just under Wayne Smith] and score a try against the ABs? If you don't ask questions of them, you'll never make them crack.

As for Smith, he and Donnelly were my MVP picks for this match. Sure, you had everyone I've already mentioned but Smith's distribution and option-taking were perfect and as Tracey Nelson's stats show, he was a beast on defense. Donnelly I pick because he was consistent. If he wasn't in the first three to the breakdown, he was with the next couple. He had a few useful touches of the ball and was great at protecting it.

Highlights thanks to RugbyDump:

Last year Kieran Read became an All Black. This year, he became a starting All Black. I was critical of his original selection and his early performances. I didn't see the merits of him, I didn't understand his role. Today, I am here to apologise.

I didn't really document these misgivings, except in a few comments on Hadyn's Public Address posts but I feel it is only right that I admit to my mistakes. Early on, I nicknamed him 'The Invisible Man' because I did not see him do anything beneficial for the team. Now I realise that this is because I wasn't looking properly.

I am used to an All Blacks team which uses its Number 8 as a battering ram. A traditional 8, someone who picks up the ball and just runs, aiming to use their physical presence to break through the line - Rodney So'oialo and Sione Lauaki were these players and the selection and use of Jerome Kaino appeared to be continuing this. Then along came a speedster. What was going on?

He was no Pierre Spies. So what was his role? He would occasionally get the ball, but isolate himself. He'd be invisible at the ruck. So how was he still in the side? Halfway through the Tri-Nations I started to wisen up. The reason I was having such misgivings was not because Read was a poor player, but because I was being so one-eyed, so closed to new ideas, that I wasn't seeing it. Read is a great player in his own merit.

Where I fell apart was comparing him to those before him - I should have been comparing him to the flankers, because essentially he is Richie McCaw V2.0. He's a fantastic fetcher and a great runner both on and off the ball. He adds an element the All Blacks were lacking with Lauaki - a threat from the scrum who can run as a forward or link with the backs.

I'm still going to continue to call him The Invisible Man - but only because he's so good at what he does that you barely notice him. Which is a good thing - you've converted me, that's for sure.

Before the Cricket kicked off [tipped off? Bowled off? Hit off?] this week, the fellows over at Sportsfreak were focused on the All Blacks' end of year tour, and the lack of tries in their games. The print media also seem to have chosen this as their lead angle ahead of this weekend's match (exhibit a, b, c, d... need I go on?) against France.

You can see my original response over there, where I gave some stats about the tries the All Blacks have scored and conceded in the NH over the past 11 years, but it sparked something in me. At school, I didn't really pay much attention in Maths. If it was something that captured my attention (like graphs and shit) I'd do it, but as soon as I got to sixth form I dropped it. It's never been a problem in day to day life, but this week I've felt completely incompetent. I've been trying to come up with all kinds of mathmatical stats and graphs for this post, and I'm extremely lucky to have Hadyn's patient tutelage to help me. If it hadn't been for him, you'd have all kinds of data here, and it would be presented on an unreadable line graph.

Something I didn't need help for was gathering the data for this. And it's actually a new feature of the Dropkicks. You can see it here. Currently it features all international test matches from 2006-today, but I may backdate it eventually if I see the need, and I may use it for a post about the Rugby World Cup and whether the 'minnow' teams are becoming more competitive.

The first table to have a look at, because I know you want to see the stuff revolving around the All Blacks, is the 6 Nations. [if this was TV that would be a hook - You would have no choice but to stick with me to find out. But this is a blog, so it doesn't work as well... Fuck.]

Good luck to both the All Blacks and France [and go Wales! Fuck yeah!] this weekend. Since the All Blacks have been reviewing the tape from the loss, so can you.